I reckon you're here cause you just want to get your hands on some cheap artificial flowers. Well, it just so happens that you are in luck, my friend, cause I can sure oblige you today. I got me a list below and I reckon you are just gonna be tickled when you have a look see. And I am just pleased as can be to show it to you too. Can you tell?

Y'know, when I first told my wife, Emma Jolene, that I was gonna open the doors up on a shop on the computer, she must have looked at me like I have two heads. I told her I aimed to show folks some low prices on cheap artificial flowers. She asked me who in the heck was gonna show me! See, it's sass like that, that puts the spice in a marriage. That woman is a pistol.

I am doing my best by you folks though. I really hope you know that. Cause I have here some darn nice cheap artificial flowers and I think they are up for a bargain, if I do say so myself.

My daddy always told me to do right by folks and work hard. That, that was all I needed to do through my whole entire life, and the rest would take care of itself. That was the truth. You can say it about cheap artificial flowers. You can say it about anything. Cause that got me where I am right now.

And this ain't such a bad place to be neither. Especially since Emma Jo is starting to cotton to me opening up this old cheap artificial flowers shop. I think all she needed was to see how everything was gonna work out. She's always been the sensible type. I'm the dreamer in the family, with the big ideas about cheap artificial flowers. I do find that I prefer it when she's agreeable to my notions though. I guess after 35 years of marriage I ought to.